Stumbling Heavenward

My pastor used this phrase this Sunday and it was just so timely. Aren't we are stumbling Heavenward? I mean none of us are cruising right along. We are still struggle with our sin-nature. We fall back in to old patterns we vowed to turn from, and sometimes we even intentionally choose to not follow where he is telling us to go.

We have been on a path of new faith these past few days, and I would even say weeks. But it is still a rocky path. As God is calling us ever so clearly to follow him, I find myself sliding back into my sin-nature of worrying, or controlling, and not trusting. This time He gently reminded me that he chose the path we are on right now, he knows where it is heading and where we will end up, and that I do not need to know. That has been made loud and clear. So I went to bed repentant over my fretting and lack of trust and woke up remembering all that God has done, is doing and the peace that I have been feeling while trusting completely in HIM.

So it has been a good few days. Knowing that I do not have to fret about a step I may take down the road, that I only need to watch where I place my feet in the next step. I only need the lamp to light the path my feet are stepping on, just that far, and I know that I get further down this path that God will illuminate my steps when I get there.
Meanwhile, here are some pics from our most recent party!!


The Birthday Girl!!

The girls getting their nails painted!

Paper Dolls for the girls to take home - I love how they came out!!

And the cupcakes for her party!!

The girls are outside enjoying the sun and their cupcakes!!

Seeing HIS hand

I am feeling immeasurably blessed today. Seeing God working right in front of you and not mistaking it or thinking it could be anything else is wonderful! It is peaceful and joyful!! That is a lot of "ful"s!

I am seeing God work in Stellan's life as we speak - and he may not need immediate cardiac surgery - which for a 4 month old can be very dangerous! What a miracle that little boy is! What a rock his mother is! What an inspiration!!

And God is working here too. We have found a home for our dog - a task that needed to be done a while ago, but when I tried God gently said no. I did not know that Izzie was supposed to go to the home of a wonderful mom - with 8 kids at home - yes AT HOME, 2 are out already and 2 more from the Ukraine are due in!! Isn't God just cool??

I emailed to check on Izzie last night, and my (new) friend told me that Izzie had been playing non-stop all day with her children, and that her 11 year old son with some issues - has bonded with her unlike any other dog they have owned. She specifically said - I think this dog is going to change his life! AMEN!! What a blessing! I had no idea! But God did and that is just so much fun to see him doing this and opening my eyes to see it all!

I feel like we are resting in his palm, that close to him, able to see what he is doing right in front of us and I can honestly say, I have never felt this way before. I have never turned over the reigns, or steering wheel, or whatever to him so fully. There is such a peace in my heart. I love it!

Wish I could have done this sooner!!

God is good ALL the TIME!!!

Simplify

That is what God has been laying on my heart for some time. So that is what we are about to do in many areas of our lives.

Not going to go into much detail, but let's just say that as God was gently telling me to simplify he yelled it really loud yesterday.

So as I was slowly starting to simplify, as of yesterday we are going to start quickly and efficiently simplifying.

God is just so good all the time. Even in the storms of life.

I am really starting to see (especially through Stellan and his family's fight for his life) that God is there even more in the storms, holding us when we cannot stand, comforting us when we cannot cope, and giving us this supernatural peace when the storms are tearing off windows and doors.

We are in a storm. It officially started - well the warning signs on February 21st about 2pm. That was the first weather report something was coming. Then about 2 weeks later another weather report to let us know it is still coming and bigger than initially predicted. Then each week we heard how it was growing and strenghtening, and well, it hit yesterday. I think we are in the eye of it right now. The initial hit was a blow to all of us. But there is so much peace in the eye - which is really in the gentle hand of God. He is holding us. We are enjoying the peace and I am planning. My nature.

So, I am excited. Have you ever gone outside after a crazy storm? It is a mess. But it smells different, you can almost feel it in the air - like electricity. And that is what we are feeling. But like I said we are in the eye right now. And everyone knows that there are 2 parts to the biggest storms, and the peace in the eye is not the sign it is over. I expect some difficult decisions, and tough days, but as I look forward and trust that God is the bringer of this storm, I am not anxious or worried. For the first time in my life, I am kind of glad to not be in charge - or really trying to be in charge. I have gladly given up the reigns and I will go where I am led.

That is so freeing!

So I hope you stay tuned to the weather channel here - to hear what God is doing and will do in the storm in our lives!

One of my favorite scriptures....

2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze. Isaiah 43:2

I am reminded we are just passing through this storm - and that it will not overtake us or set us ablaze! What a promise!
(and just because it is 4:30am does not mean I am fretting, I woke up thinking Anna was screaming - and once I was up I could not turn off my mind. So I am enjoying a few moments of a perfectly quiet house while the rest of our brood dreams!)

Precious Time

It just flies by. It seems like it anyway! I cannot believe that my dear little girl is going to be 3 on Friday! I cannot believe it! I mean, where did the last 3 years go? I know that in those 3 years Kristen has managed to add 2 to her family, but it just seems surreal in a sense.
Time.
It just flies by in the good and the bad times. I struggle to hold the precious time I have with my kids in my hand and savor it. But as I try to hold tight to it, it slips out and runs away. The days go by so fast. So I just pray that God is taking my fleeting moments with my kids and allowing them to soak in and make a difference. I mean, that is what it is all about. Leaving a Legacy. I want that. I want my children to grow up and look back at our lives together and feel joy and feel loved more than anything else. I hope that they will look at the hours we spent around our school table or in the park or just reading on the couch and remember the moments that we shared. Not just me with them, but them with each other.
I see their friendships strengthening and that is such a gift. These boys really treasure one another, they have pure joy in their faces when they look at one another and tell each other stories or replay an event. I see the love they feel. When one falls or gets hurt, the others are there to support the injured one and really offer comfort and support. I even am starting to see it with their sister. When the two little ones are alone with each other and they play, I see the love they share. My little girl just loves those big brothers, she looks to them for everything, and they love to provide it all to her. I know that if we went different ways each day for school this special relationship would not be allowed to flourish like it is.
What a gift!
Well, as we plan to celebrate a little girl birthday on Friday there is already so much to do! A tea Pot cake, cupcakes, and more! But it will be fun and I think she is going to love it. The boys will be having a boy party in the back with cousins and friends so they will be entertained too! It will be fun.
But bittersweet too. To watch our youngest get older and more independent is hard sometimes. Watching her demand that she do it her way is tough, but at the same time I love to see the little girl she is becoming. A sweet girl, who loves her family but is very shy to strangers. A girl who always has a smile for me and her daddy and hugs for all of us. She really is just precious, but I do wish the time would slow a bit so I can enjoy her younger days a little more!
Well I must go grab some of those precious fleeting moments with my kids while I can.....